Monthly Archives: February 2012

Whirling dervish

I am flying around, tomorrow starts dart tournament weekend here. DTW is the weekend, every year, that my Dad hosts his Moose tournament and people from all over come to shoot darts, drink (a lot) and see friends that they don’t see all that often.

While, I don’t actually shoot darts, as I suck, I love DTW as I party with my family and with friends, and spend most of the weekend at the lodge. Until two years ago, Tony and I volunteered at every tourney, now we no longer do, which makes the weekend so much more fun.

Off to run errands, more throughout the weekend.

February 28th

I did something today that I never thought I would do. My friend, Jenny, was going to the trailer she owned with Michael to clean out a bunch of things today as she is selling it. This was the place where Michael died, and the first time I had been there since his death.

Walking up to that door was one of the hardest things in my life, just because I know that he died in that building. That is the place where he hit rock bottom, thought things were as bad as they would ever get and took his life.

I did it though, I made it in there, sat in the room where he left us, and made it through. It has been 14.5 months since his death and it is still impossible to believe that he left us at 34 years old. The thought that he will never be 35, 36, 40, 50, 60, and beyond is so hard to comprehend.

Over the past year and two months I have said pretty much all I can say about him, albeit with it all wrapped up in his death, so maybe some day I’ll be able to write about him, without it being wrapped up in that day. For now this is enough. Enough words, enough sharing. I made it through something I never thought I would do and I am glad I did it.

Walking in that room seemed to make it real and make it so I can let it go, some, and move on more than I have in the past year.

Sidenote: Suicide hurts more than yourself, you hurt your family, your friends, everyone around you questions why they couldn’t save you. If you are feeling like you need to hurt yourself please get help. Call a friend, a family member, your doctor, the local hospital, or ER. Or call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255.

Please, get help, don’t do it, you have no idea how many people love you and will be drastically affected forever, even if you think they don’t, they do.

The Movies

We took Tre, Charlie, and Timmy to see Star Wars: The Phantom Menace in 3D. Holy cow, 3D movies are expensive. Three adult tickets, two child tickets were $64 and that was before popcorn and drinks. That is just ridiculous and reminds me of why we do not go to the movies often. I do believe we are about done with movie theaters, other than if they do the next two Star Wars movies in 3D as the kids never got to see them in the movie theater.

We took the Intrepid up (My Mom has been letting me use that car for 1.5 and she rocks for that) and fitting all five of us was tough. Tony is tall and a big guy, and Timmy, who is 19 is a giant. He is well over six foot tall, probably six foot four or so, and just wide. We put him up front, and Tony in the backseat with the two little guys who are in booster seats, still.

Tre is 53 pounds at 8 years old (and 3′ 11″ I believe.) He is tiny and while age wise he is old enough to sit in a seatbelt without a booster, his Dad and StepMom are absolutely doing the right thing by keeping him in a booster. Luckily, he doesn’t mind it as he understands how small he is.

Charlie is 55 pounds, 3′ 9″ at 7 years old. He is obviously in a booster, as well, and will be for quite a while yet. They got him a booster seat that has flames on it, so he is all for using it, because “It is so cool, Aunt Pooh!”

After the movie, we took the kids out to eat, luckily we had a gift card to cover most of that, as we spent a lot on the movie. Tre hadn’t been feeling good all day, and you could tell at dinner as he barely ate anything and he turned down vanilla ice cream. Tre never does that.

We finally got the two little guys home around 8:40, then Tony drove Timmy all the way home (Timmy has autism and doesn’t drive.) It was a long day, but so much fun that it was well worth it.

My Laundry Soap Recipe

I know most people just buy their laundry detergent, but after looking around for a bunch of recipes, and trial and error on my own, I came up with my own, easy to make, cheap, good laundry detergent.

Ingredients:

Soap, I use either FelsNaptha or Zote. Both can be found in the laundry aisle at Walmart, or online. half a bar of FelsNaphta, 1/3 a bar of Zote, grated finely.
Washing Powder, 1 C Again, you can find this online or the laundry aisle.
Borax 1/2 C same place.
Water.

Equipment:

Grater
Pot
Wooden Spoon
Five Gallon bucket with lid

Now, one bar of Fels Naptha will make two batches, the Zote will make three. The washing powder and borax will make multiple loads and you can use for other things. I have worked out the numbers for me, and using half a cup of soap per regular sized load and one cup per super sized load of laundry, this lasts months and costs 1-2 cents PER LOAD. Now, if you figure out how much cheaper that is, you’ll run to make it. Seriously, before it was at least 50 cents per load of laundry.

Grate the soap into the pot, add a couple quarts of water, heat on medium on stove, stirring often until soap dissolves entirely.

Measure washing powder and borax into five gallon bucket. After water and soap has cooled just a bit, pour into the bucket, stir well.

Once it is stirred, fill five gallon bucket up with warm water, stirring all the while. Let it sit for about 24 hours, then you can use it. It will be a gel with liquid, use an old measuring cup to measure it to use. I always dump the detergent into the washer, then add the water, letting it melt well, which doesn’t take long at all.

This detergent has very little scent at all, which I find to be a plus, as I don’t like my clothes to screw up the scent of my perfume. You can add 5-10 drops of essential oil to a batch if you like it.

Other uses for the Borax are to scrub your tub or toilet, mix with hot water and scrub your floor. If you have super dirty laundry add an extra bit of it to the load of laundry.

Too much to do.

Life is so busy here that my house is a wreck. I have so much work to do in here, and a leg that will not cooperate.

I have been on the search for new dresses and skirts, as pants just aren’t working for my leg very well anymore. Unfortunately, the company I normally buy my dresses from seems to be going out of business as they have very little in stock. That sucks as not only am I a big fat woman, but one who has a certain style that most places do not sell clothing for.

As the store seems to be going away, I need to learn how to sew better. Right now I can do basic things, basic garments, but I need to be able to start making my own dresses. The hardest part is adjusting for my body as my ass makes my skirts too short in the back, unless I add inches. I will get it though, I’m hard headed as hell.

The last garment I made is a simple little sundress out of very cheap fabric, it is cute, but not really something that I am wiling to wear all the time. The fabric is just rough on my skin and I hate that feeling. But, the design of it works beautifully for me, so I’ll drape the next just like that one, only I have better fabric to use. A cotton with slight stretch and it is red, which is one of the colors I wear all the damn time.

I also have two large pieces of fabric that have a mod design on them that I adore. Sadly though, they are that odd slinky fabric that so many fat women’s clothing stores love, that if you don’t cut it just right it shows off every lump and bump of your body.

Those pieces of fabric may very likely become skirts so, I can wear them with a shirt over them to hide some of the bumps. We’ll see though, I may buy a piece of slinky I don’t care about to practice on first.

Time to get moving on my day. Have a good one!