Learning to live normally

Weight loss content. If not interested, move on, please.
 
 
I just baked six varieties of cookies including my absolute favorites chocolate chip.
 
I ate a clementine instead of cookies.
 
I haven’t weighed myself recently, but I feel fantastic. Seriously, I feel better than I have in 10 or more years.
 
My pants are fitting better and pants that were too tight now slide over my ass and onto my waist.
 
I am exercising on a daily basis and adding minutes each week.
 
And again, I feel better than I have in years.
 
I am learning how to do this. Like last Sunday I went to the closing of JarrettThor Art Gallery. They had all sorts of yummy food. I ate light the day before and after so I could have some of it.
 

For the average person that is common sense. I know that. People with food issues have to learn to eat like this.

People who grew up poor and have food issues really have to learn this. Growing up money was very tight. If something really good came into the house, you ate it as fast as you could so you got your share.

I never got over that. Even as an adult who is doing better than my parents did I still have issues with eating free food until full, or overfill, and to never ever wasting food.

Prior to the past few months, if there were leftovers in the fridge that were getting close to going bad, I would eat them. It didn’t matter if I were actually hungry, it couldn’t go to waste.

Now, I’m learning to cook in smaller quantities (Still working on that one) and if I am not hungry and it is not on the plan for the day, it doesn’t get eaten.

Again, this is revelatory to someone like me.

This week I am eating lighter even than the past few months so I can eat dinner at my parents on Christmas Eve and then dinner on Christmas day without guilt.

Thanksgiving was a test. I cooked all the carb-filled heavy food plus several kinds of vegetables. I made my sweet potatoes with just baked sweet potato. No sugar, no nuts, nothing like that.

I ate small portions of some of the food, but I kept it small. Again, this is all new to me.

I have binge eating issues. I have for years.

Since I began eating better this time I have only binged once.

I’m starting to think I can really do this. Instead of a diet so much, I am really doing a lifestyle change. I have changed what I buy, what I cook, what i even think about putting in my body.

There have been no potato chips in my mouth for months and months. And, I love potato chips. Seriously, they are a food group to me.

Slowly, but surely, it is working.

Now, I just have to ignore the cookies until they are eaten. I may very well just have Tony put them up out of my reach. I mean even as good as I am doing I only have so much willpower.

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