If I could think of anything worse than every swear word I know I would use them all.

I have a diagnosis, and it is the bad one. Renal cell carcinoma. I have to have a bunch more tests run, and my doctors have to get together to set my surgery date.

The surgery should be within the next two weeks. We won’t know until after surgery what the next step will be.

Today was the endocrinologist’s appointment and a spot of not as bad news. My A1C is 5.6, we are not changing my meds, my left kidney seems to be functioning well.

A small spot of good is really nice amongst all the bad.

Tomorrow is my urologist appointment and Friday is back to primary care for a cellulitis check. My word I am exhausted, all this back and forth, driving an hour each way is just wearing on me. Plus, the whole insane cost of gas is just wrecking our bank account.

Ok, that’s about it for tonight. Thank you so much for all the emails and good thoughts.

I’m home for now. They are running a bunch of kidney function panels and other screenings to try and determine if the mass has spread outside the kidney.

It is no longer a 95% chance I’m losing it, it is a done deal, the kidney will be coming out, no matter what is found, as it can do more harm than good as it is.

I see my surgeon on Thursday afternoon, followed by my whole team of doctors to get everything set up. So, within a week or so I’ll have the surgery, then 4-10 days in the hospital, followed by several months of recovering.

If it is cancer, and the chances of that are more than 70% it is, they will go from there regarding decisions on chemo and/or radiation treatment. We’re hoping that the mass is in the kidney completely and that I will not have to go through either of those but, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.

Complicating all of this is my allergy to iodine, the contrast used in CT scans and MRIs is iodine based and I have to be on steroids and benadryl for 12 hours prior to any scan, so big pain in the ass, plus the contrast is extremely hard on the kidneys. With me soon to have only one being nice to my other kidney is a good thing.

So, in short, thanks for being there, and we’re still in a holding pattern.